Chocolate Cravings:
Chocolate-Creamy, rich, luscious delightful love of mine you have provided hours, days, late- nights
of comfort to my broken heart & crushed spirit. Your antioxidants and aphrodisiac qualities have
boosted my spirits and enabled me to just get through the days & nights.
Ice- cream- So many dates with Ben & Jerry’s, Haagen- dazs, and company…Your silky, sweet sensuous
presence in my life since childhood has calmed me, eased my pain, and soothed my nerves. However;
you have prevented me from being a size 2!
Then thinking and pondering; where am I supposed to be? Where am I meant to be? This is a
question that has tortured me endlessly for years. I am willing to go to many different countries and
cities. I simply don’t know where my chocolate is. I should say I haven’t a clue as to where God wants
me to be or what He wants me to be doing because I spent so much time pursuing the pleasures of life
and becoming obsessed with planning my career, and falling in love with drop- dead gorgeous men
over the years.
In my almost 29 years of living, exploring, seeking, searching, and longing, I have discovered some
important truths about myself. The first is my two greatest weaknesses are chocolate and unusually
handsome men. They both make me giddy and melt. Another is I will never learn enough. There’s
always so much more to know- to embrace, to practice. To make my own, to develop, as I seek to
develop my own gifts and talents; I hope to use them responsibly and prudently for the benefit of
humankind; a tall order I know. I was meant to help people.
I can ramble, dear reader. But I hope I still have your attention. There are nuggets, some deep, some
chewy, and some as delectable and sweet as the finest Belgian chocolates (Neuhaus) He brought me
gourmet chocolates often. The last one was with the message of “Practicing delayed gratification.”
The implication was in the reward that was to follow.
My gift to you is myself, my memories, experiences, lessons learned, and little bits of
wisdom sprinkled like chocolate chips in a cookie. I hope to educate, enlighten, encourage, inspire you,
and most importantly to help you heal. May my words be as a healing balm to your heart…
He has become my obsession. I try to be as creative as possible with him. Thus, I brought whipped
cream, the chocolate kiss,
Chocolate Therapy
Give me your love. Extend your arms to me in an open embrace. I want to be your dreams,
fantasies, hopes, your peace, your love. Tender mercies I thrive on and subsist on just as protein bars
and smoothies. (I highly recommend GNC’s Peanut Butter Surprise- fit for a heart’s dance. But be sure
to ask that it’s prepared with chocolate soymilk for the bomb taste!! =)) Loving, strong, gentle, touch &
voice lift me up. Believe in me, my love.
hot, sexy, talented spicy with notes of cinnamon and cardamom, but the
smoothness of whipped cream and rich seductive qualities of chocolate
There were numerous tests and trials; strange happenings today that I anticipating my need- want
for it I bought a can of whipped cream and I have been having a heavy finger on that nozzle just like an
alcoholic would take shots. One piece of chocolate and then a shot of whipped cream and vice versa…
Now Dove Dark Chocolate Mint Caramel (only 3 left) – I must stop crying and sleep because there
exists no more source of comfort. The arsenal is empty.
Last piece of chocolate). (Love) I just kissed my chocolate because it has been too long since I have been
lovingly kissed. (I secretly wished I could enter- just for a moment- that could turn into eternity …
That the chocolate would return the kiss. In my dreams...
The chocolate has melted, softened a bit; the way my heart has always been. I wish with all my
might that the hearts of the men I have always loved and always will love would be that way- they
would melt, both because of me and in my presence.
No, they have all remained frozen just like dark, solid, hollow- without a center- chocolate in the
winter time: So hollow…
(The last, final piece of chocolate) Goodness, I hope I will be granted sleep soon by the one who gives
me dreams and visions. (Opening it up slowly, carefully unwrapping the foil- it is soft and gooey from
my body heat) I guess I still have it! I’m still a HOT woman who melts chocolate, but when will I melt
the heart of a man that I love, not simply one who loves me, but the one that I want- desire more than
any other. This makes me smile. Relief. Praise the Lord Jesus! I look lovingly at the chocolate, almost
the way an ancient scribe would gaze upon the oracle. He is seeking for answers from the oracle.
Where do my hope, joy, love, and relief lie? I lick it with the tip of my tongue as a cat laps up
milk with her tongue. No burst of revelation yet, but alas I notice the flow has ceased, the tears have
evaporated, and the source has been cut (for now). Oh, how wonderful it would be, if it would be
forever. No more tears! No more mourning! You are forever banished!
The Holy Spirit brings to mind the scripture. “Weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in
the morning.” Morning- run to me, come to me quickly, I want and need you so… (Now I slip the last
chocolate into my mouth gently, savor its sweetness, its richness, - no chewy, just a lovely massage, and
let the flavor, the caramel and mint harmony refresh and caress my tongue as only caramel can and a
caramel colored man could )with a hint of milky coffee or mocha with whole cream).
It says prophetically, “One great chocolate moment leads to another.” Now I lay me down to sleep.
Exhausted completely and thoroughly, I’ve emptied the contents of my heart onto these pages. Can
you- do you hear their echo? Do they have the power to transform you? Melt you- like chocolate?
Would you permit the Holy Spirit to melt and transform you? {From the harvest of tears, I reap 30
small pages in a little notebook to add to my book for you. It’s the ultimate expression honest to the
core, raw and unabashed- to my dear precious reader. My love letter to you!
Feel everything, look at life with poetic justice…Seek to be inspired. Look around you and breathe;
take it all in. Fear not the energy. Allow it all- transfigure the force so it empowers you.
Artificial love is like artificial food. It may satisfy the hungry beast for the moment, but it
leaves a gaping hole and the craving for more, much more lingers.
“No, no – and I drank no chocolate because you came. She clung to him. So it’s sad; it hurts, but he wasn’t.”
Curious, isn’t it, but I still look upon the lovely Asian face of the water lily with a sense of awe and
possession, after all these years and my experiences as the Lipstick Nomad.
I want mint enrobed with chocolate, to bathe in it, soak in it, and then lick it up, to forget and banish my heart sick. How much my heart fancies gazing at beautiful cheek bones this Saturday night!
I ate wine flavored gelato with chocolate chips and 1 scoop of English Bread Pudding gelato at Dolce
Vita- gelato café in a suburb of Miami just across the street from the Trump Palace Condos.
If only I learn the lesson and APPLY it, but like
a little girl who begs her mother for that delectable morsel of chocolate and the confection- the bakery,
I want my drop- dead gorgeous (honestly absolutely flawless) handsome, pretty boy, sexy man and I will not settle damnit!!!
(After all there were so many attractive, cultured, moneyed, refined, and sophisticated men there- the crème de la crème. Ooh, now I want some crème brulee, but with a hint- no who are we kidding with a big doo wop of chocolate!
To make love to me with wild abandon and release the cavalry. May all the Trojan horses march,
canter, skip, run, and then charge while entering the Pearly Gates- spreading myself open to be engulfed
by him, to feel the expanse of his expanding manhood- the family jewels pulsing inside of me, with
the deepest penetration so our souls meet, drink wine, eat chocolate, and dance together in ecstasy…
Free and bliss!
To look him in the eye and deny myself (my flesh) pleasure from him was the ultimate in challenges.
Sizzle in Soul:
Yet, I am a complicated, multilayered woman, a bit of tiramisu, and a splash of French champagne
and a chocolate layer torte. I straddle the line between being deep and superficial, the intellectual yet
the doe eyed Barbie girl.
If you could read my mind… If I could read his mind….-
I am crazy with love again that I must suppress or find an outlet for. What about my girlish
enthusiasm like when I jump up and down because of a new decadent Ben and Jerry’s flavor, like Mint
Hot Chocolate Float with an extra cup of pure whipped cream.. See darling I am pure. I struggle to be pure.
So I put pure things inside of me…
Craving for love.
Because I am ready for love and passion:
(And slather my body in chocolate- Nutella tastes better than the generic play things, with its rich
succulent creamy hazelnut flavor. Natalie, Venetia, and other friends who likewise enjoyed the treat
had to keep it under lock and key to keep it away from a certain little church mouse… {squeak, squeak,
scratch…}
Since I was a child, people told me that I needed the struggle to become the
woman God created me to be as I inhaled chocolate chip cookies and grabbed tissues by the fistful…
I have gone through it so like a copy cat now I can show you that you too can get through it.
Longing for a kiss I decided to put a chocolate heart-
Heart’s Desire 50% off chocolates post-Valentine’s Day. I placed it delicately on my lips,
closing my eyes, and relived a kiss – beckoning the feelings forth, it is then as I manipulated
the delectable morsel over my lips- that it began to melt, disappear if you will.
(Listen to Enrique Iglesias and Whitney Houston’s Song: Can I Have this Kiss Forever?)
…that I realized – tasted the sweet (bittersweet) nature of the impermanence of a kiss… I consumed
it rather than make a sticky mess. Temporary pleasures perhaps- indeed wreak havoc on our souls when
they fade away into oblivion. We are left with a craving and longing- greater than before the initial first
blush of love.
Euphoria and taste… we have surrendered and become lost within the ivory towers of the bygone
era. To reminisce is to flirt with becoming a Pillar of Salt as Lot’s wife well knows. That one extended
glance back with longing for what one has left behind has been the warning signal precluding the ruin
of many = Distraction & Broken Focus
Desire overtakes me and I consume with a flick of my tongue – suck the chocolate filled peanut
butter heart from my lips. My experiment of a slow, steady kiss failed (as the chocolate rested on my
lips, with murmurs of motion (quiet subtlety) – my lust overpowered me.
I couldn’t stop, with but one glimmer of heart and I yearned for more…bliss, ecstasy and so it was
with my sexuality. How fleeting the experience of love had been for me. They have all- my lovers had
far exceeding love for the world – pleasures of the world- then I.
They tasted my body- my essence and discarded with no thought of me; whereas I searched in vain
to capture their exquisite scent to recall and conjure up the moments of pure joy, blissful ecstasy, and
euphoria. I enveloped myself in the mist of their embrace.
Should you regularly be unable to tolerate solitude- you know those alone times when no one
answers their phone when you call and everyone is busy with other things when you want to spend
time with them. I just love it when I have a surprise day off and I text several people who complain
about me being too busy to see them and I am like I have free time if you want to hang out, and I get
no response!!!! So I curl up with chocolate.
“…If you feel you can’t stay away from him physically or even emotionally…in the sense that you
can’t stop thinking about him – chances are you’re in thrills (the throes) of narcissistic love.”
{It’s the season for Enigma- listen, allow the poetry to resonate with the yearnings and faith in your
soul- the faith for love and completion.}
Time for a break from unbelievable intensity and drama: Sometimes I feel that way when I am
reading from the Old Testament in the Bible, the books of the prophets. I can’t take anymore. Then
God allows me to realize: If you need a piece of chocolate after reading about the unspeakable horrors
and must distance yourself from it… Imagine living it in the flesh. I say yes, I need to be stronger, be
like a soldier who can endure any trial, test, or tribulation.
A gentle reminder, Love, I have no home. There exists no such thing as coming home for me.
Should I stay home, then I feel lonely, I’m more prone to cry, and heed the call of Ferrer Roche, Andes
Mints, Ben & Jerry’s most exotic flavors…etc. and some good old fashioned chocolate chip cookies.
I’m not a Promiscuous Girl! ( Listen to more of Nelly Furtado- Promiscuous)
Just 1 Drop- dead gorgeous Sexy for me, please topped with whipped cream and raspberries, and 1 serving of honey to
coat his skin….dark chocolate for the antioxidants!
I would prefer a generous portion of course!
If I had what I most verily wanted- sought after- I would be content to come home, reenact my most
vivid sexual fantasies, dress- up for my love, play with food and props, etc. Our private parties would
exceed all others in comparison! Because then I would have a home. I could be the wild, insatiable
sex kitten I have envisioned myself to be so he will always be captivated by my tresses, scent, image,
essence, allure- all the beauty and feminine charms…my very soul, my body which was Designed for
love making.
Home is in his heart, within his soul, covered by the wings of his embrace…
Let us create more together, dream up projects, as a team, realize your vision, goals, and mine.
But I can’t express how I need your love just as I need air, water, and chocolate.
